Water cooler moments

There’s nothing like a bit of intrigue and gossip to brighten up your day. With that in mind, I have looked into my crystal ball and, in Popbitch-style, have made a few predictions about what’s going to happen music-wise over the next few months.
A well-known UK hard techno DJ (no, not Dave Clarke, the guy I’m talking about isn’t that well known yet) who has a long-running residency at one of England’s biggest techno nights will release a guitar/industrial-based album that could propel him onto the stadium circuit;
Diynamic, a small Hamburg house label, will release one of this year’s biggest crossover records, a la ‘Rej’ or ‘Body Language’: the plucked string melody of Solomun & Stimming’s ‘Feuer & Eis’ will be played everywhere this year;
Every Norwegian with a scruffy beard and unkempt mane will be required by law to make cosmic disco;
Barcelona will become the new Berlin, only with better weather and a beach as an influx of producers move to the city to avail of next to nothing rent in the wake of the Spanish property market crash;
Following in the wake of Dr Lektroluv and Redshape, another member of the European techno community will assume a fictional, cartoon-like identity to release an album project;
One of Berlin’s most popular minimal labels will launch a sub-label to cater for the rising demand for house music both in Germany and internationally;
Gui Boratto’s ‘Beautiful Life’ will be used as the theme tune to at least one major sporting event;
one of Germany’s most popular ‘pastoral’ techno producers will open a bird sanctuary with the proceeds of his DJ fees.

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